Lying to children – a short treatise

Posted February 24, 2006 * Comments(6)

Wjy do people bother? I honestly don’t understand why anyone lies to a kid. All this bullshit about childhood magic being shattered by growing up is only relevent if you’ve told the kid a bunch of crap in the first place. If you’ve never been lied to as a kid then there is no shocking truth that disappoints you. No illusions to be shattered. And it isn’t traumatic if you never believed in Santa Claus, I know someone who never got the lie, and never thought they had missed out. How can you miss an illusion you never had?

My parents have told me 3 lies in my life. They are Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, and “You can have a puppy

6 Comments so far

  1. Earhart on February 24th, 2006

    Where to start?????

    1. Coca Cola has done more to encourage the upkeep of the Santa myth than any parent or group there of.

    2. Children Suck

    3. You were lied to more than 3 times (IMHO). Was there an Easter Bunny? Were you told that God gave your Mummy your lil bro/sis in her tummy? Were you told that there was No Way robbers could come in to the house once it was locked? Just think about it…… You may also have been told that you would get sweets in the event of being good….

    4. Sex can and sometimes does involve urine (not something I’m into you understand, but your mother may have been!!! )

    5. NORMAL is 90 degrees to the horizontal. As long as you walk upright, you are therefore normal.

    6. Try being happy – we’re not always right

  2. artemis on February 24th, 2006

    1. Coca-cola would have nothing to work with if the myth was not propogated.

    2. Everyone is entitled to their opinion

    3. I was never told there was an easter bunny, or that my siblings were from god/the stork/found under a cabbage leaf/anything else blatantly stupid. And I grew up in Kerry, I don’t think we ever locked the house.

    4. I have no words

    5. I doubt I spend even half my time standing upright :)

    6. It may not be possible to always be right. Which is no reason at all not to try to be right all the time anyway. And happiness is a consequence of something, not an achievement. Trying to be happy is like trying to be sad, or angry, or nervous. Something has to prompt that reaction, even if its just thoughts in your head. And I could never think my way to being happy without being right first :)

  3. mammy on February 24th, 2006

    God almighty this is heavy stuff. Sorry about Santa Claus and the tooth fairy, Diane. I think I wanted the fantasy for myself and your father; who let’s face, it grew up devoid of all fantasy; wanted it even more for his kids. Right or wrong that’s what happened. Would I do the same again? I don’t know. Hindsight is a very exact science. I would also admit that sometimes I found it hard to believe how intelligent, deep thinking and introspective you were as a kid. Those are the only 3 lies I knew I could attempt to get away with even if they were short lived.
    No-one has a “right” to be happy though it can be an enjoyable state when one is in it. However I think one owes it to oneself to try to be right as often as is possible. My aged brain needs recuperation time now.

  4. Earhart on February 24th, 2006

    A little rough on mammy there Diane – although I’m surprised she didn’t react to the urine comment!!!!!!!!!

    If I knew the truth about everthing, I wouldn’t live alone!!!!!!!

    Also, if you knew as much truth about aviation as I do – you wouldn’t fly………….

    It’s all relative

  5. artemis on February 24th, 2006

    The point is not what I would or would not do based on the knowledge. The point is that I would rather know. And you do fly Ruth, so thats hardly applicable :)

    I suspect she chose, as I did, to completely ignore the urine comment in the hope that it would go away :)

    Saying that everything is relative is exactly the same as saying, for example, that some stuff is physically bigger than other stuff. Its true, it can be said about a great many things, but it has absolutely fuck all bearing on anything.

  6. mammy on February 25th, 2006

    That wasn’t being hard on mammy. That’s Diane being the girl I know and love and I wouldn’t have her any other way. If I wanted platitudes there are many out there in the human race who dish up nothing else. Maybe we Northern Irelanders just prefer forthrightness, warts and all.